When you were a child did you have an imaginary friend(s)? Do you have a child who has one? Many years ago I dealt with a mother who was distraught over her son’s ongoing comments about an elderly man who would often visit him at night. This child wasn’t frightened, in fact, the opposite. The child would cheerfully relay at breakfast what this man had said during his latest visit.

The mother explained that she was planning on taking her son to the doctor and depending on their recommendation, possibly to a therapist for treatment.

I asked her if she believed in ghosts. She hesitantly nodded, but immediately countered with a rational query about why a ghost would be visiting at all; and why her son?

I explained that young children remain very strongly connected to the spiritual realm while they adjust and integrate into the physical world. As children become more physically acclimatized, usually by the age of 5 or 6, their ‘tether’ to the spiritual realm diminishes. When I asked if we could delve into who was ‘visiting’, she readily agreed. I described to her the man who her son was connecting with. She confirmed my description, as tears began to well in her eyes.

I went on to say that this man was a close relative and father or grandfather figure to her. She nodded as she wiped the tears away, and replied that this man was indeed her father and her son’s grandfather. She explained that her dad had passed suddenly the previous year from a heart attack. There was no chance to say goodbye. He was here and then gone.

That’s who is visiting your son and talking with him at night. He is your son’s Protector and Guardian, which is a position of honour. If your son isn’t fearful, you needn’t be. She dabbed at her eyes. Why doesn’t he come to me, she quietly asked? I explained that children are still unfiltered and easier to reach out to, plus the fact that your father was extremely close to your son when he was alive. Again, she nodded in agreement. I advised her that her father had reached out to her numerous times through small glitches in her electronics and that she had on several occasions caught a faint whiff of his distinctive aftershave. Now smiling, she stated that she had indeed recognized that familiar scent of his. As logic overrode emotion, she had actually looked around to justify the source of the fragrance, which of course there was none.

In closing, her father stated that he would discontinue his nightly visits if that would make her happy. She emphatically stated that as long as her son wasn’t frightened, she was just fine with it. She stepped back from the notion of taking her son the doctor and actually looked forward to hearing what her son would have to say at breakfast about the latest visit.

There are times when an imaginary friend should be a source of concern to a parent, but prior to this step, perhaps discern the other possibility first and foremost. It was a happy relief, revelation, and connection she was able to have with her departed dad.


Deborah Johnson

Clairvoyant, Medium, Author, Speaker


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