For many years a large part of my work has been to help those who have lost loved ones find solace. There is no easy way to cope with death and loss. There is also no definitive on where we actually do go once we pass, which heightens our anxiety around our loss.

Science has not been able to solve the riddle, nor has anyone passed and come back to enlighten those of us still on this side. If we knew for a fact what lay on the other side and where we were headed upon passing, not only would it remove our own personal fear about what is to come, but we could rejoice in the fact that a loved one had ‘made it’ to ‘that place’ upon their passing. We would have comfort and closure with this knowledge.

In our grief, we each cling to what belief resonates best with us. For some it is the belief in Heaven, for others it’s Nirvana. Some put their faith in reincarnation, while others believe once you die that is it, you exist no more.

Regardless of individual philosophies we all experience the same heart-wrenching, overwhelming grief when we lose a loved one. We each struggle in our own way to come to terms with the passing and rationalize the ‘why’ of someone so special being taken from us.

Over the years, the following are the three questions my clients ask me the most:

Where is my loved one now?
My experiences as a clairvoyant medium have consistently shown me that our loved ones pass into an energy state, and they remain with us in this state as we carry on living out the rest of our lives. At our time of passing they then welcome us over and we transition from being with our loved ones on this side, to standing with our loved ones who have passed before us.

I’ve also witnessed that they hold certain ‘positions’ around us to provide specific energy to us when needed. When a loved one on the other side stands at our right side they give us a very gentle nurturing ‘let me take your arm and walk with you step by step as you walk through your life’ type of energy. Some stand directly behind us giving us ‘that boot in the pants to help us along’ type of energy.

Then there are those who stand at our left-hand side. These loved ones act as guardians and protectors of us where our environment is concerned. They help to keep us safe when we’re learning to walk, ride a bike, use the stairs, or drive through a busy intersection. These loved ones have taken the position on our left to keep us out of harms’ way to the best of what they are allowed to do. Unfortunately, some things are meant to happen and cannot be avoided 100%. The position on the left is an honour, like standing guard at Buckingham Palace, and it is a life-long commitment. A position I’ll delve into further in future blogs. This position reflects that age-old saying ‘for every birth there’s a death and for every death there’s a birth.’ Often, there is a passing just prior to or after a birth in the family. The individual who recently passed is usually the soul who takes up the left side position to stand guard for the duration of the new-born life. Remember it is an honour to have this commitment.

Are they settled and happy?
Firstly, let me reassure you that I have always seen loved ones in an embodiment of euphoria created by unconditional love, peace, and true contentedness with simply being. The burdens and restraints we experience in human form have been removed and the spirit is free in its truest form. They express genuine joy with where they are in general, but their emotions do not change just because they’ve passed.

They grieve just as deeply for us as we do for them. They also deal with the awareness that they are the reason for our grief, yet they can no longer physically comfort us, so they reach out to us with the only means they have, which is their energy. This leads to the third most frequently asked question.

Are they still with me – how will I know?
They reach out to us in a number of ways, the easiest being interference with our electronics – yes sometimes those blips and quirks are caused by those on the other side. We also sense them – from a fleeting scent of perfume, aftershave, or tobacco to a sudden chill we feel from no apparent source.

They come to us in our dreams and touch our very hearts and soul while we sleep. My favourite method of experiencing them though is when I find a dime at the most unexpected time or in the most unexpected place.

Regardless of which method our loved ones use to reach out to us, it’s their way of saying ‘I’m still right here with you!’ It’s that gentle loving nudge and hug they would give you if they were still here.

Please join me and hopefully find comfort, understanding and enlightenment in my upcoming blogs as I share stories of spirit on both sides of the veil between life and the life after.



‘Connecting and understanding spirit, both living and passed’


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